09
Apr
Melancholy Zen
4:45am: A state of melancholy zen overcomes me and nothing else really matters anymore.
A few minutes earlier (at roughly 4:42am) I was concerned with how badly I wanted to go to bed, how badly I had to go to the bathroom, and how badly I wish I hadn’t finished Olevia’s curly fries. All of those worries swirling around my head were quieted by one thought.
There will come a time, very soon, where I will not be able to hold him like this… and I will miss it greatly.
I held him for a while longer. A number of minutes past where it would be “safe” to lay him back in his bassinet, I begrudgingly laid my son in his snuggly blanket and stroked his head a couple times.
Then I ran to the bathroom.
One response to "Melancholy Zen"
i know that feeling. eli will be 3 next month and i still have it almost everyday. im sure the feeling is stronger when you already have watched one grow and grow, but i have had that moment and you are not alone.